Sunday, February 23, 2020
Today was a true picture of a lazy Sunday. Whit had just woken up from his nap and I was feeding Walt. Both boys in my lap. Whit’s sleepy head resting on my shoulder all curled up and Walt chowing down on his lunch. My heart could explode. Nothing could ruin this moment. Whit would occasionally gently touch Walt’s head and lay his head down on Walt’s chest. The love he was showing his brother was the sweetest. This genuine moment makes me pray these boys will always care for each other deeply. I didn’t have to ability to capture this moment, not with a camera at least. I etched it into my memory though. It’s a moment I hope I always remember, but you know how time passes and some sweet memories get replaced by new ones or sadly easily forgotten. My heart is so in love with this time that I feel I’ll never be able to forget it.
Things have been trying here lately though. We found out Walt is in need of hearing aids (which is hard to hear that your child can’t hear), we are worried about his head sutures, and he’s going through a serious fussy, colic time each night. I mentioned earlier that I loved hearing his cry because it was a sound we hadn’t heard from him yet. But this is hard, when he just cries and cries and you don’t know why or nothing helps. At one moment the swaying motion of my arms soothes him and the next he looses it and we haven’t changed what we were doing. My arms are going to fall off at times from holding him out and bouncing because it’s all that seems to help calm him. Emotions and stress can take over and make this even harder. Thankfully my amazing husband will step in and take over to give me a break, we’ll take turns. Parenting is definitely a team event, taking both people to help take some of the stress off.
We have an appointment with an Atlanta Pediatric Neurosurgeon here in Columbus on March 4th. Once a month he travels here to see patients, which is so nice and helpful with the travel. I asked if we could see him sooner if we traveled to Atlanta and got a quick, hard no. So we’ll take the first appointment we can get.
The concern with his sutures could be one of a few things: His sutures are starting to fuse together not allowing his brain to grow, or his brain isn’t growing so it’s not pushing his sutures out, or there is no issue and his sutures just aren’t smoothing out just yet. I’ve heard of two other families we know of who’s sons needed surgery to help their sutures. The surgery isn’t an easy one, but both boys are doing fine and thriving! It’s not a surgery we’d want to have done, but we are praying that if anything, his brain is growing. Im also hoping he’s not fussy because he has a headache, which would be from his brain growing and his skull not growing with it. Our appointment will help give us some more clarity or peace of mind.
But I go back to that moment with both boys in my lap. Both small enough to snuggle with me. Both loving their mommy time almost as much as I’m loving it. And then later while we were playing, Whit walked over to me, took out his papi and gave me a kiss. Just a sweet little kiss. Oh my sweet boy, so tender hearted. I pray you always stay so thoughtful!
For now Walt is doing amazing! He’s growing, cooing, staying awake more during the day and squirming around more. I keeping holding on to his progresses and those sweet moments like today’s. There’s no need in stressing over something we aren’t sure of yet, like whether there may be a need for surgery on his sutures. We won’t worry until we have a reason to. For now, the only real concern is figuring out how to get him comfy and settled more at night time and no more crying! 😉